For the Love of the Nature Potty

Three year olds, man.  You can't live with them...

Luckily, our favorite three year old is becoming less and less of a tantrum-ing, stubborn, hot-headed being and slowly morphing into that glorious four-year-old we know he will be.

Just a quick funny story so I don't forget it and because it SO depicts what THREE is like in our household.

I picked Oliver up at preschool at 12:00 yesterday.  I always pack him a lunch on preschool days so he can eat it in the car on the way home.  My lunches have morphed from "ooooh, what shape can I cut your sandwich into today?" and "let's draw a cute face on that cheese using a food safe pen" to throwing cut up strawberries, a barely cut PB&J sandwich, and a handful of crackers into the lunchbox in the morning.  Best laid plans...

Three minutes into our 20 minute drive home Oliver declares he needs to go potty.  NOW.  I am driving on the freeway through the worst interchange ever (highway 16 to I-5, you get me?) and the thought of running into a disgusting gas station bathroom in Fife is not very appealing.  I tell him, through his near-tears, that I will find a place to pull over as soon as I can (this is a bold-faced lie, but he doesn't catch on).  I start talking and don't stop.  How was your day at school?  Who did you play with? Was everyone there today? What are you eating right now? How many crackers do you have left? Where is the moon?

If you've had to distract a three year old in a car before, I'm sure you're aware of how this conversation sounded.

He seems to forget that he has to go potty.  At least he hasn't mentioned it in 15 minutes.  We get to our house and I back into the garage and say "I'm going to un-do your seatbelt and you RUN into the house because I know you have to go to the bathroom.  I'll grab your backpack and coat, you just GO."

Well.  What a dumb idea mom.

Oliver: I'm going to go nature potty.
Me: The bathroom inside is closer.  When we are at our house we use the bathroom inside.  Quick, run in.
Oliver:...NO!
Me: It seems like you really had to go potty, please go inside quickly so you don't have an accident.  I will grab your stuff and take it in for you so you don't have to worry about it.  I'll meet you inside.
Oliver: NOOOOOOOOOO! (and proceeds to scream and cry and STAND NOT MOVING in the car)

I took everything inside and took my time setting it on the counter.  Then I came back out to the garage and said from the doorway "Oliver!  I'll stand right here and wait for you, hurry!".

More screaming.  I close the garage door (but leave the garage light on).

"I can't SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! I can't SEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"

And then a pause.

And then "I PEED.  I PEED IN THE CAR IN MY PANTS!!!"

At which point I walk down to the car and reassure him that it's ok, let's get his pants and boots off.  He's still standing IN the car and distraught because he can't find the herbivore tooth he made out of clay at preschool.  In the dark of the car.  Still sobbing.

So I tell him to get out, I'll find the tooth.  We strip him down on the garage floor and I climb back into the car to find the tooth.  We talk about how it might have been a better idea to go inside when I asked him to when he has to go potty and then we go inside, get him into new undies, and he finishes his lunch.

So.  He was fine.  Mama had a little more laundry to do.  And we survived another tantrum.  Just another day with a three year old...not many days like this left.  I know I can make it and I will love these stories forever.

To Zoë Maxine On Her 6th Birthday

Dearest Zoë,


My how you have grown into a kid.  Like.  A big kid.  Not a toddling
toddler or adorable preschooler in pigtails, but a grade-school aged KID who has talents and opinions and ALL THE FEELINGS.

This year you:
-started taking piano lessons
-continued ballet and have started in the big kid class
-gotten back to gymnastics at The Little Gym
-almost nearly perfected a handstand and nailed a cartwheel
-finished your year in Nature Preschool
-started Kindergarten
-tried (and LOVED) soccer
-went camping twice
-rode your OWN bike around the River Loop in Sunriver for the first time
-went to Disneyland
-participated in your first kids triathlon


You are fiercely determined to do things well.  Like, really well.  You take after your Daddy in that regard.  You are a stellar gymnast, ballerina, and pianist.  We have watched you do probably 100 handstands a day for the last four months.  You are working on the splits to earn an ice cream party from your ballet teacher, and you are giddy with excitement when you nail a recently new song on the piano.  It makes my heart swell to see you enjoy so many of the things I enjoyed growing up and I am bursting with pride when one of your many teachers tells me how talented you are.  It is not because you are insanely gifted at so many things but your determination to do them well that has brought you to the level you are at.  One of my favorite compliments from a teacher came from Ms. Shannon at The Little Gym when she told me "Zoë really LISTENS when I give her a correction and can run away and the next time she comes back she REMEMBERS and can master the skill because she is so coachable.  That is unusual for her age."

The amount of things you have learned from Kindergarten is astounding.  You LOVE to practice your sight words from school, love to practice your reading, love to tell me about what you played at recess, who was the helper of the day, what you had for snack, and just how excited you are for the 100th day of school (although you can never seem to remember what day the current day is so we can figure out when that will be...).  You love your teachers.  All of them.  Ms. Keil is held on a pretty high pedestal in our household.  You have made friends quickly and often at school.  You love to play make believe on the playground and dinosaurs in the classroom.  We had a gaggle of little girls at our house this weekend to celebrate your birthday and it was so much fun.

You have become quite the emotional, feeling BEING since the start of school.  Not sure if it's really school and the routine and just how tired you are after a full day of working hard or if it just comes with the territory of being a grade-schooler but MAN! you have some big feelings every day.  Tears come fast.  If something is unfair we hear about it.  As your Dad says, you play well with Oliver until you don't.  The bickering with your brother has truly begun.  But on the other hand you are caring and kind and take care of him as a big sister should.

We are SO proud of you, Zoë Bowie.  We are proud of your brains, your strength, your tenacity and determination, your passion for the things you love (and don't love), your loyalty to friends and family, and your sense of self, which seems oh-so-developed for a little girl of 6.

School Dayz

School is pretty much the greatest thing ever for both kids.  Whatever trepidations I had about Z starting kindergarten are pretty much non-existent and Oliver absolutely loves preschool.

Oliver got to start school first due to the teacher's strike in TPS.  He walked into his classroom with confidence and has been so delighted with everything they do.  He's in the indoor classroom which means they spend two hours (ish) in their classroom every day and then about an hour outside every day either in the schoolyard playing or on a hike around Snake Lake or up to Coyote Flats on an expedition.  His teachers are wonderful; Ms. James and Ms. Renicka.  Oliver comes home telling me about all of the fun things he is learning and what he does every day both inside and outside.  It is so nice for him to have something that is all his (as opposed to all of the other activities he does that his sister does, too).  His favorite friends are Ruby and Cece, the sisters of two of Zoë's friends from her class at the preschool too, which is great.  Their families are wonderful.

The hardest part about preschool for Oliver has been trying to figure out how to dress him each day.  Luckily it has been SUCH a mild fall, we haven't had to deal with rain much, but he gets SO hot when he's outside running around that a coat is really too much for him.  He's usually pretty comfortable in a fleece pullover, a thermal under-layer, a pair of fleece pants and his hat.  It's pretty different from the layers upon layers upon layers we worried about with Zoë in her all outdoor section last year, which is probably why I'm so baffled.  I'm sure next year when Oliver is in the all outdoor section I'll feel better about getting him dressed properly!

Every day his teachers do an amazing job of posting pictures of the kids and their activities for the day with a description of what they did.  It's a fantastic talking point for us to ask Oliver what he did during the day if he doesn't offer many details (luckily, most of the time he does!).  As always, we are SO thankful for the Nurture in Nature Preschool.  We couldn't have found a better place for our kids to grow and learn.

Zoë LOVES kindergarten.  She is in her happy place when she's at school and she is doing SO well.  Every day at bedtime when we do favorite parts of the day she ALWAYS says "school" and when we ask her what part she replies "ALL of it".  Every day.  She has the most wonderful class of 20 kids who are so cute and good.  Her teacher, Ms. Keil is absolutely amazing and loves Z to pieces which warms my heart to know someone is looking after her.  She'll send me a picture every now and again of something cool Zoë is doing which is an added bonus.  Zoë's favorite specialist is music.  Mrs. Flanagan is pretty great and Zoë loves learning about music.  She was THRILLED this week because the librarian gave her A CHAPTER BOOK to check out.  And, she feels just ok about PE (which makes me sad because she LOVES to be active and play).  She isn't excited about the exercises they do every day they're there, but she does love to play games.  She's met lots of new friends and I hear about what they play at recess and during free choice time in the classroom all the time.

We are so happy that she is thriving at school.  She is SO DARN SMART.  I love hearing her reason through math problems we do in the car (you have five snowmen, one runs away...how many are left?!) and listening to her practice skills at home (counting by 5s and 10s, telling us about spiders, her sight words, etc).  I'm not sure why it surprises me about what she's learning...but it's so fun to hear each new thing!  She is still a book hound, reading every chance she can get.  We've finished quite a few chapter book read-alouds (the latest one was Stuart Little) and she's hungry for more.  We are most proud that she advocates for herself at school.  She's talked to Ms. Keil and her substitute about moving seats because she has a hard time concentrating near someone in particular (but she loves to play with that student, and I love to hear from her that she can differentiate how it's fun to play with someone but maybe not sit by them in class because they are distracting!).  She hounded the librarian about the perfect book for at least three weeks.  Chris and I talked about it last night what a good job we have done about making her do her own asking from the time she was very little...asking for a balloon at Red Robin, asking for a straw at a lunch counter, asking for another cup, etc.  A pat on the back for us, if we may say so ourselves.  ;)

More to come, but we love school and are so glad.

Halloween!

We kicked off the month with another year of the Stein Dash.  Both Chris and the kids ran and did a great job!  And then some chicken dance, pretzels, beer and root beer later we hit the road. 

Zoë earned a Student of the Month award for Responsibility (of course she did).  We are so proud of her.  She is THRIVING in Kindergarten and her favorite part of the day EVERY day she has school is "School.  All of it."  But more details about that later.





Chris and I had a super fun date day at the Adventura High Ropes Course in Woodinville mid-month.  It was SO much fun.  I haven't done a ropes course in about 15 years and was SO nervous about my skills and how my age may have compromised my ability to climb anything.  It was scary but fun to do together!

















Coordinating family Halloween costumes is getting slightly more difficult now that both children have opinions about what they want to be.  However, they are both still pretty committed to "matching" as a family, so we settled on The Incredibles this year (along with every other family in America thanks to the second movie being released this past summer).  Zoë quickly chose Violet and wished SO HARD that Oliver would pick Dash but nooooooooooo.  He chose Frozone.  And it was perfect.  And he was the only Frozone we saw out and about.  I chose to be Elastigirl because, duh.  And Chris chose...Edna.  To be fair, his wig was awesome.  So, we rocked that family costume for, what I fear might be, the last year we can get our act together as a group. 





We had to skip out on our annual friends Halloween party because Zoë ended up being violently ill quite quickly so we stayed for the evening at my parent's house and watched football until she started puking and we made a quick exit.

Chris took the kids to the CHE school Halloween Dance (only a little bit reluctantly) and they had a blast.  I was in Albuquerque but got lots of fun videos of the two of them dancing.  They definitely LOVE to dance.  They also attended another friend's Halloween party that weekend.  I missed out on a lot of Halloween fun this year!

But I had SO much fun going to ABQ and spending time with the Palevich family AND meeting my NEW NEICE NATALIE!!! 




















Zoë's class had a Harvest Party the morning of Halloween and Oliver and I got to go and help and enjoy the Kindergarten costume parade through the school AND the party in Ms. Keil's classroom afterwards.  Oliver was the BEST helper, stuffing all of the treat bags for each student and then he got to participate in the games too.  Lucky brother!

Ms. Keil's Kindergarten Class

Zoë and her BFF Bailey

Telling jokes with Uncle Connor

On Halloween we headed to Proctor Treats again with Grandma and Grandpa and honestly, I don't think I would choose to do it again.  It's basically standing in line for an hour.  The kids, of course, love getting candy but when we got home after a chaotic dinner (have five different adults telling you what to do is stressful), we quickly ran (in the rain!) to the houses on our immediate street/cul-de-sac to do some legit Trick-Or-Treating and the kids had the time of their lives!  I couldn't even keep up!  I'd start talking to a neighbor and they'd quickly squeak out "thank you!" and be halfway to the next house before I even started saying goodbye.  It made me so happy and I tried to be as neutral as possible when I asked which event they preferred and equally as neutral (though I was doing a happy dance inside) when they answered that they'd much prefer to Trick-Or-Treat in our neighborhood next year. 

Go Fish

Zoë had a great first few days of school and, surprisingly, she was very chatty about all of the details both days!  She thinks her teacher walks on water.  And I'm ok with that.  :)

Our kids are obsessed with games these days.  We play one or two nearly every night between dinner and bedtime and we DEFINITELY play Go Fish every time.  This is really Zoë's obsession but Oliver is getting freakishly good at remembering who has what.  It started out with him comically and accidentally showing us his cards every two seconds.  We would all yell "Oliver! Your cards!" and he would scramble to hide them while knocking many of them out of his hand into full view.  Or when he'd lean over to 'fish' for a card he'd flash the entire hand to everyone while leaning in.  Slowly, he has been getting better at protecting his cards and it seems related to how much better he's gotten at playing, too.  Zoë is the WORST loser in the entire world.  She pouts.  She whines.  She kicks her feet. She cries.  I'm not sure where she got it.  So, all of this game playing is either going to help her out of that rut or just make us all miserable every time we play a game forever.  Hopefully the former rather than the latter.  Oliver's game of choice is either Candy Land or the egg matching game we have that's adorable.

Zoë has been...emotional.  So whiny.  So pouty.  I'm trying to keep reminding myself that the start of school is the root of all of this emotion but it's hard.  We have sworn off any organized activities for the first several weeks of school (no family dinners, no parties, etc) but, against my better judgement, I took Z into town today for an adventure.  On Friday when Oliver was telling her all about his fun day riding the train and participating in Park(ing) Day she had some SERIOUS fear of missing out and sobbed about missing all of the fun stuff.  Oops.  So I told her that if she practiced the piano on Sunday I would take her on an adventure.

We rode the train from the park and ride into downtown and went to Tinkertopia, this super cool alternative art supply store.  They have an "Open Tinker" time for an hour and a half and for $7 anybody can have access to any tool there and most of the supplies!  SUPER FUN.  Zoë had the time of her life and it was so much fun to watch her mind work.  Twenty minutes into the time she was already planning her next trip.  To be honest, I'm excited to go back too!

The Night Before Kindergarten

Zoë.

Zoë Maxine.

Zoë Bo-ey.

Zoë you are starting Kindergarten.  You are a school-aged child.  Tomorrow you will walk up our street in your giant backpack plastered with pink and yellow mermaids and unicorns.  It is the most hideous thing I have ever seen and you LOVE it.  And the matching pencil case and lunch bag, obviously.

Your mama is not ready but you are SO ready.

I worry about you.  I'm worried about you melting into the background because you are the most compliant five year old and say "yes, right away" when you're given a directive.  I'm a teacher.  I know how wonderful it is to have children like you in a classroom and how easy it is for you to get lost.  Oh, I know you will be loved.  We have met your teacher and she is amazing and loves you already.  I still worry.

I worry about what other kids will say.  Let's be honest, you've led a pretty sheltered and controlled five and a half years.  We don't say "butt" in our house.  Or "shut up".  You don't hear us talk about our weight, you don't watch scary movies or tv shows.  You don't follow any YouTube channels to know about popular characters, toys, or songs.  Sorry, kid; your parents are the meanest.  But what if someone calls someone else fat?  Or stupid? Or ugly?  Worse yet, what if they call YOU any of those things (OMG)?  I worry.









I worry that you will be bored.  That you will be losing out on precious playing time.  That you cannot run wild and free imagining whatever and whenever you want.  What you could learn in half the time and the other half of the time you are sitting waiting.  Waiting for others.  Waiting for the bell to ring.  Just waiting.  I worry.

Always with the worrying.  I inherited it when I became your mom.





And then, I watch you.  I watch you rebel in small ways, testing out the waters at home.  You'll never just "melt" into the background.  You have too much personality.  Your ability to tease and to tell jokes is enough to keep you on everyone's radar.  You have a sparkle in your eye and adorable freckles on your nose and cheeks.  That red hair, alone, will keep anyone's attention.

I watch you with your brother; the empathy and care you show towards him when he is distressed, hurt, or hungry.   You know how to care about people and I know you will do so at school with your friends and the adults there because it is the right thing to do.  And we've taught you The Right Thing To Do. And when you hear something that is unfamiliar you'll come ask us what it means because we never balk when you ask us a question, no matter how absurd it may be, because we WANT you to keep asking us questions.

I watch your mind create when you have free time.  You create drawings and stories and songs so easily I am in awe when I hear it.  I know that you will not be bored because you have the capacity to create in any moment.  Your mind will never be bored.  Your teacher will be amazing and will keep your mind moving.  She will know when you need a push.  You will LOVE Kindergarten.  You will love the stories and the songs and the reading and the counting and the hula-hooping and the rhythm clapping in music class.  You will thrive.

I know that the thing I fear the most is your independence and how much of it will creep into you the more time you spend at school and that terrifies me.  I've been able to control almost every moment of your life until now.  I know what you watch, what you eat, how much you sleep.  I know your friends, your fears, what makes you laugh and scream with joy. I am aware that I can't hold onto you forever but I would sure like to try.


















So please, could you just glance back once at me before you disappear into your classroom tomorrow?  Could you give me one small wave so I know I'll be all right?  I know you'll be all right.  It's me that's falling apart because I feel like my baby is walking away and a big kid will return.  A confident, kind, smart, creative, silly big kid who is going to share so much of her personality with the world starting tomorrow.

I love you, big girl. Have so much fun, I can't wait to hear all about it!

Packing it in this summer

The Fourth of July was super fun.  We went and participated in the Browns Point Bike Parade again and had a fun time, and then spent the rest of the day at my parent's house with my sister's family!  Chris was thrilled to be able to shoot off tons of fireworks.  :)




































We have been busy, busy, busy this summer.  Chris started on the pool project mid-July and he's working his butt off destroying the yard, digging a giant hole, and putting together the pool kit.  He's my hero!  We are trying to stay out of his way.  It will be worth it next year!

Chris and I headed to Chelan to participate in Chelanman, the multisport festival they have there.  I ran (using that term loosely...) a half marathon and, despite not actually registering for the race and doing a last minute registration, he completed a half Ironman!  What an athlete.  We had a fun night away from the kids but decided that Chelan is not our favorite place (or place to race). 









The kids and I have been exploring parks in Tacoma for the past two months and we have discovered and rediscovered some amazing places.  It's fun to adventure with them and for the most part they are willing partners.  We hit up Charlotte's Blueberry Park, Chamber's Bay, Kobayashi Park, amongst others.  Such fun.
















We have three and a half more weeks before the school year starts for both kids and I am teary almost every day thinking about Z starting kindergarten and O starting preschool.  I really don't know how to hold myself together.  I need to get a grip, though, because I don't want my sadness to transfer to Zoë, who is really, really great about catching onto what her parents are feeling.  She starts Jump Start on Monday, a four day program for incoming kindergarteners to spend some time with their teachers and classmates learning about how to "do" school.  Well, that's what I thought anyway.  It has come to our attention that she won't be learning about who her actual teacher is until the LAST day of Jump Start.  I'm irritated, to say the least.  We have gotten nothing in the mail about how to prepare for the event.  Do the kids wear uniforms? Bring a backpack? A lunch? A snack?  We've gotten some answers from the school's PTSA Facebook page, but not all of them.  UGH.  Thankfully, Chris took the first day off from work to work on the pool (and provide emotional support).

Oliver has been doing better than, well, before.  His tantrums have subsided a bit and he's finally beginning to communicate with us when he's SUPER upset.  Prior to a few weeks ago he would just sit and sob and scream when he was mad.  Now he'll take some deep breaths and squeak out a few words so we can actually talk about the whole thing. 

He has been having a super hard time sleeping at night when he naps in the afternoon...sometimes.  He ends up in our bed a ton even though the portable air conditioning unit is in his room!  Zoë has also had a hard time sleeping, but I attribute that to it being so darn hot.

We spent a couple of nights in Pasco two weeks ago with Jenny and her family which was so much fun!  The kids had an amazing time playing with Taylor and Lyla, swimming in the pool, and I had a great time catching up with Jenny. 

I also had the great opportunity to be a TC at leadership camp this past week and it was so wonderful to spend four days with middle schoolers (truly!) teaching leadership skills and character development.  It was marvelous.  I hope I am invited back again next year because it's something that definitely filled my bucket in the absence of teaching.